As we explore the topic of silence, it is inevitable that we talk about the words we speak. Not only does practicing silence require us to speak less and listen more, but it also gets at the heart of the matter– specifically the heart that is in us. We are seeing more and more how listening to God is a heart-stillness, a heart-readiness, a heart-focus, rather than an outer condition or environment. At some point it seems reasonable to turn that inside out, and look at how our changing inner hearts will affect the words that come out of us.
It’s pretty straightforward cause and effect, that a heart tuned toward Self will produce words that promote your welfare and your concerns…and the more one’s heart is consumed with God, the more your words start to reflect His beauty, His nature, His concerns. Similarly, when you are filled with thankfulness for His blessings, it’s much harder to complain on the outside. When your heart longs for more of His beauty and goodness, the words to make yourself the center of attention just don’t even seem to matter any more. This connection between heart and words is predictable enough to be plotted on a graph. And we laughed ruefully as a group, about the mathematics of words…how a greater volume of words leads to increased potential for the wrong ones coming out, and for useless chatter…and how we women are good at using words. (Sobering when you realize that in terms of sheer verbal potential, women are twice as likely as men to let their tongues get into trouble.)
But looking at the math does make you consider the words you speak in a day and how you will spend them…makes you take a long look at what is inside of you. Jesus put it in more agrarian terms when he said a tree is known by the fruit it produces. “No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit.” (Luke 6:43) But His point is the same, that words and actions grow out of the soil of a person’s heart. It may take awhile to look past the showy leaves and bright colors, but the proof is always in the quality of the fruit.
James borrows the analogy and adds the idea of a water well, mocking the idea that you can draw both good and bad water out of the same place. We all understand how what is inside is eventually going to bubble up into our speech, even if we are trying very hard to keep our mouths shut. So rather than figuring out ways to guard our tongues, it seems like we would do better to guard our hearts– and then here we are, back to the value of cultivating silence before God. When the insides are silent and resting in His presence, that kind of thing can’t help but show up on the outside. And it’s starting to sound a lot like what Paul was encouraging us to do: “Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” (Philippians 4:8) A heart that is focused on Him and full of praise for who He is, is going to overflow into words that are “helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Ephesians 4:28)
Lord, help us to keep putting these things into practice in our everyday lives, “and let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” (Galatians 6:9)
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“Simply to refrain from talking, without a heart listening to God , is not silence.” (Richard Foster)
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“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.” (Proverbs 25:11)